Once upon a sunny Sunday...

Woke to freezing temperatures and forecasts of snow but brief glimpses of wintery sunshine...

Three ingredients for happy weekend working: laptop, toasted hot cross buns and tea.

Followed by papering up my office wall in readiness for paint splatter!

Gathering colours and palettes...

By my standards, huuuuuuge canvases - at first really daunting but the more I live with them, the more excited I am by the freedom they represent... 

And yes, I was still in my pjs when I took this but it was early, before I'd braved the outside world. No sign of the snow yet but it feels and smells like it's on its way! It'll still be warm and bright inside though... painting in sunshine colours is my plan.

Will let you know how it goes...

Love is a promise...

..., love is a souvenir, once given never forgotten, never let it disappear.

John Lennon

(1940-1980)

It's been quite sad around here for the past few weeks and as far as my brother's concerned, we aren't quite through the crisis yet. He's slightly more stable now though and being well taken care of and although he's not much better, he's also no worse, so we see that as reason to be optimistic. Thank you for all the caring wishes and positive thoughts. Please know that although I haven't been around here much, I am reading and taking to heart every kind word, passing them on to my family, and am so thankful for them. For you. 

I'm struck this weekend by how even in sad times there are so many reasons to be thankful and sometimes even to celebrate. A year ago I stood beside two of my sweetest friends as they declared their love for each other and we celebrated that declaration with a beautiful, traditional wedding party. I can hardly believe a year has passed already but it has, and today I congratulate them on their first anniversary with wishes of love and a traditional gift to mark the occasion - of paper.  Well, of mostly paper. 

I've long wanted to try making one of these little tag collections and this gave me an opportunity to do so. The tags are tiny, not much more than an inch high and I'd intended to do twelve but, in the end, nine worked better. On them I compiled a small collage of things from the wedding day, including a few picture transfers, pieces of paper embellishment from the table decor, pressed flowers from the bouquets, shells from the beach, snippets of ribbon and fabric and other bits and bobs. The photograph is not the greatest (a combination of rushing and bad lighting - sorry) but this is how it turned out. 

It's been good for me to have something so positive to focus my attention on this weekend and it gave me pleasure to recall the joy of the occasion and to lose myself for a couple of hours in something creative, to escape the gnawing anxiety of the past few weeks even briefly. It's hardly an artistic masterpiece and I don't anticipate it'll become a family heirloom but I'm hoping it will serve as a reminder to them, for a little while at least, of the happiness of the day and the happiness they are wished in all the days to come...

They're away right now enjoying a romantic weekend break so I'll be giving it to them tomorrow when we meet for an after-work glass of bubbly. I do hope they like it.  I'll let you know.

And I hope that wherever you are and whatever you are up to, you are having a relaxing and love-filled weekend too.

♥ K

Brief Journeys - to Nottingham for a play date...

I didn't see much of the city of Nottingham, but I'll definitely go back for another look. The station's beautiful. And that's usually a good sign.

My class was well worth the journey. We spent all day cutting, tearing, gluing, transferring, collaging, painting, stamping, tea-staining, drawing, writing, scrunching, inking, sewing... Lots of techniques that many are familiar with but that I have never tried before. Several skills I need to practice so that I can improve them beyond the level of a three-year old. But it was actually lovely to feel like a three-year old, to just delight in the process and not be too hung up on the outcome. I enjoyed the experimentation. I think it's fair to say that the results were mixed and I liked some better than others but, at the end of the day, I took all my pages and bound them together into a book that I am quite chuffed with. It's very different to anything I've made before but still reflects some of my favourite things - the sea, maps, words, texture... these loves will out. And it's something I'll continue to work on and write in with pleasure.

I was so blissed out at the end of it all that even when three trains in a row were cancelled without explanation (adding over an hour to my return journey) and I then had to share it with a large and raucous crowd of drunken football fans (and not the nice kind) I was unfazed. I sat and enjoyed my iced tea and thought about the day...

A few random observations:

• Although we all had exactly the same materials to choose from and to work with, each journal was so very different. It was amazing to see the extent of that.

• It was a small class, which I liked. Although it made it impossible to hide, creatively that is. The other three participants and the tutor are all qualified, professional artists (a graphic designer, a textile and costume designer and two multi-media artists) with evidently greater skills than I have. This made me quite nervous at first. But, I was able to shake that off, get stuck in and just focus on what I was doing and then lose myself in it, and when I did that I didn't feel inadequate by comparison. I managed to complete fewer pages but, at the end, my journal didn't stand out as worse by a mile. This was good for my self-confidence.

• It's good for me to put myself in the position of beginner in a group like that. The initial discomfort is worth it and apart from the joy of learning something new, it's wonderful to observe talented and skilled people at work. I do so enjoy being in the company of artistic souls.

• Also, although it's an entirely different context and I like to think I'm quite aware of this and remain empathetic, it's always a useful reminder of what people might be experiencing in some of the workshops I run myself.

• We all chatted comfortably but when we were really in the flow, conversation ceased almost entirely. And that felt comfortable too.

• For many of the techniques, and in general, I felt more at ease standing up. If I ever have a studio space, I should build a counter at waist height... It doesn't harm to dream.

• I love to write. And more and more, to take photographs. These are both great creative outlets for me. But there's something about the tactile, getting-my-hands-dirty creativity of working with stuff, that's satisfying in a different way. I love it. I must remember this.

• I really enjoyed the sewing, and particularly combining paper and fabric. Even very simple stitches add a dimension I like a lot. Perhaps I should invest in a small sewing machine. Or dig out my needle case and practice my hand-stitching.

• For a few happy hours, I lost myself in play. And it was great. More than just creating the the thing itself, and learning new skills, it represented an acknowledgement of my need for play, and a willingness to act on that. I should do it more often. And it needn't involve a class. I have all I need at home to play, I just don't allow myself the time. It feels like a guilty pleasure and I have no idea why. I don't have to account to anyone except myself. I resolve to do better...
  
  
• Happy weekend-me = fractionally happier Monday-me. It's not a miracle cure. But it does help.

Happy Monday to you too!

♥

P.S. extra pictures here if you'd like a peek at some more of our journal making.

P.P.S. Thank you to everyone who commented on yesterday's post. You guys are the greatest! Thank you for for sharing your thoughts and insights and support - I do so appreciate it. I wonder why this label of artist (equally, writer/photographer) is one that's hard to adopt? I know I'm not the only one who feels this. It puzzles me. Even more, I wonder why, when I eschew pretty much all other labels, this is one I'd quite like to be able to claim? Even if it's only in my own heart, not necessarily on my passport. Weird!

Delirium translates into colourful recycling and two sneak peeks

Delirium:

I've had about three hours sleep in total in the last three nights and not a lot more than that each night in the week preceding. It's not good for the brain, not to mention the body, which is looking more droopy and haggard by the hour. Delirium has set in. Stupid brain. Everyone knows sleeping on an upset or dilemma is a good idea but my brain is just not buying it. Everyone also knows that sleep deprivation is a form of torture but apparently my mind thinks it knows better. Or maybe it knows it full well? 

Either way, I have come to accept that when there's something on my mind it takes me into reclusive mode but doesn't necessarily like to sleep on it. Although, sometimes it does go the other way and wants to sleep every hour of the day and night, which is a different kind of challenge.  But it's one extreme or the other and I'm not really sure which is worse. This time it's taking the little or no sleep route.

So, what does one do with all those extra waking hours?  I used to be an eight-hour-a-night-or-simply-cannot-function type of a girl but I've learnt not to fight the insomnia now and in these times I watch a lot of movies on dvd, surf the net, even manage to read a bit - not that I remember much of anything afterwards. It's just about distraction. Hoping that I'll fool my head into following where my body longs to go. Normally I'm not up for much that's vaguely creative or even constructive - although I have been known to clean the house at 3am when all else is failing to distract, and that's somewhat constructive I suppose. But, I digress....

The past two nights I've left my bed - after staring into the dark for long enough to be convinced that sleep is not an option - and have been trying to do something creative to help force me through the cycle.

I'm very much a dabbler when it comes to these things.  I've always enjoyed writing but never did art at school past primary level and, although I've always loved colour and texture and collage, only truly entertained the idea that I might be visually creative when I hit my 30s. Now I'm often frustrated that I can't draw or paint as well as I would like to and that what I see in my head seldom translates onto the page or canvas, so I tend to avoid the frustration by avoiding the craft. 

What do you mean Michelangelo/Da Vinci/Picasso practiced and practiced to get that good?!? I'd prefer to plug myself into a progamme downloader like they used in The Matrix and just acquire the skills - preferably during a nap please.

Sneak Peek Number 1:

Aaaannyway, practiced or not, I do enjoy paper & mixed media art 'cause I can get away with not having to draw or paint much. Although I've not done anything for some time I've recently been persuaded to revisit the idea of making mini books. I did make a little concertina book for a friend once, which was quite fun and she seemed to like it, but this time I wanted to try and make a loose-leaf book using only bits and pieces I have lying around at home. And although I live in a small apartment, I have lots of stuff that qualifies as 'bits and pieces' tucked away.  

I'm a hoarder (although I prefer the title Collector of Eclectic Treasures and Materials) and am always hanging on to all sorts, thinking that I'll find a use for them one day. And in fairness, I often do, even if it is 10 years down the line.  

I also cannot resist stationery and have a collection of stationery supplies that would stock a small shop - although I am much better about this than I used to be and try to recycle a lot more, which dramatically reduces the necessity (or excuse) to buy stuff. I don't scrapbook but I like all the pretty papers and goodies that scrapbooking and craft stores make available and I've given in to the temptation of some of those too. I've also never really mastered the rubber stamp but that hasn't stopped me buying a couple over the years, just in case I one day win the Matrix style Ph.D. in Rubber-Stamping download in a blog giveaway or something. Doesn't harm to be prepared. Just one of this and two of that, but it all adds up now to a sizeable stash.

My plan then is to try and use at least some of the things that are just lying around in one of many Ikea boxes, unappreciated by anyone but the sad part of me that loves to know that when exactly the right project for the sticker of a cute snail that I bought 8 years ago, and have carried to four new homes in the interim comes up (yes, really), I will be able to produce it!

You notice that with delirium comes waffle too?

So, what was the point I was trying to make about 4 paragraphs ago?  Oh yes, recycling, making things, mini-book experiment... Well, I think despite lack of sleep or perhaps because of it, this weekend I've made one I quite like and hope the recipient will quite like too.  My beloved sister, who is often the guinea pig for my little projects and always manages to seem pleased to receive them, is the inspiration for this first mini-book, made 'specially for her, by me, with love. She does sometimes pop over to this blog so I'll not give it all away but here's a peek...

I used a variety of words that come to mind when I think of my sister as prompts:

• Beautiful (inside and out)
  
• Intuitive
• Loving
• Loyal
• Creative (she sews and embroiders exquisitely as well as being a wonderful photographer)
• Fun
• Sister
  
• Friend
• Mother
  
• Hearts
• Flowers (Daisies in particular)
• Pink, Green, Turquoise
  
• Far away

It just seemed to come together effortlessly as these things magically do sometimes and I bought absolutely nothing to do it. Although I will be needing a new glue stick now.

 

Recycled in this project:

• A number of tags and labels - off clothing and other purchases
  
• 3 odd buttons - those spares that come with clothes that I have to cut out because they otherwise drive me mad as bumps in my seams
  
• Rhinestones left over from a fancy-dress costume made for New Year 2007
  
• An Italian public-telephone calling card - saved since my last trip to Rome in 2003
  
• Wrapping paper from a gift received for my Birthday last year
  
• Sparkly flower confetti from the same gift
• French, Australian and British stamps
  
• Various images out of magazines and catalogues - cutting these out is something I have done since I was a child and I find is another distracting but not too mentally challenging insomnia activity 
  
• A paper serviette - loved the colourful design so couldn't bring myself to use all of them at mealtimes
  
• Plastic sleeve from a purchased card or something similar - have a pile of these!
  
• Orange sticky back paper bought for a presentation project at work that in the end did not require it all
  
• Several postcards - including one bought and written but never posted on a wonderful trip to Positano that my sister and I enjoyed together some years ago
  
• Cereal boxes cut down for cardboard 'pages' to cover & collage - great weight, not too heavy, not too flimsy
  
• Envelopes sent to me by friends - one already made out of recycled paper as seen here - recycling recycling woohoo!
  
• Bubble wrap that protected recent Etsy purchase en route to me - simply cannot throw this stuff away although I have heaps more than I'll ever need
  
• Beads from various sources - including a favourite necklace of my sister's that broke about 3 years ago
  
• A pretty teabag sachet - the tea was nice too
• Gold and coloured foils from chocolate wrappings - they still smell of chocolate - yummy!
• Old sheet music - can't remember where that came from
• A butterfly cut from a gift tag - given to me at some point since I moved to this city almost three years ago
• White card - from inside stockings purchased to wear to Tango
• Pink felt cut from what was once quite a nice little money purse owned by a friend - it had a broken zip so she was going to throw it away along with some other junk but I retrieved it from the pile because I love felt and liked the colour...
  
• Ribbon - various bits but the longest rescued from a blouse on the same pile as the felt purse and was going into the bin after being scorched by an iron
  
• A variety of plastic do-dats from heaven knows where - some I know I have shamelessly picked up on the street and one from someone's earring that I found attached to my scarf after a too-close-for-comfort rush-hour Tube ride in London
• The cute snail sticker (and others) - not strictly recycled but saved from obscurity in the box where they have all lived for years!

In truth it's hardly dented the volume of stuff (I guess maxi books would be the way to do that) but recycling is incredibly satisfying, isn't it?  And now that I've unpacked my stash...  friends and family beware - mini books all 'round this Christmas I think! Just what you've always wanted?  I've already made a start on my next one... for a very dear friend who is still waiting for the Birthday present I made her in September but then decided I didn't like so haven't yet posted.... Perhaps two mini books will make it up to her?

Don't worry E, if you read this, I wouldn't do that to you! Just the one I promise...

Sneak Peek Number 2:

Okay, so if you've made it this far through this post, you're probably a little delirious yourself.  And should be congratulated for your staying power.  

If you've just skipped straight to the end of the post (perhaps to make a comment about long-winded posts) I don't hold it against you.

Either way, I did promise two sneak peeks and the second is that this week, on Wednesday, I am going to be announcing my first ever GIVE-AWAY...  I'm very excited about this.  I love, love, LOVE the idea of give-aways. I've been waiting for an appropriate time to do one and I've decided November it is.

So, if you are willing to risk being the recipient of a delirium-induced creative recycling project (and some other goodies) check back later in the week to see what's required...

I have to be up for work in less than 5 hours now so I'm going to go to bed in the hope that my brain will surrender tonight and let me get some rest before the working week begins. Hope you have a good Monday!

What do cakes and knits have in common?

There has been recent discussion in the blogosphere about the tendency of some blogs to be a bit too "nicey-nice" or pretty. If you haven't already seen them, and you're at all interested, check out the links on blogging in this post.

If you just fancy some proof that this is not the case (and perhaps a little giggle) check out the sites below, both of which celebrate in their own way the not nice and the not pretty.

As you might remember, I'm sharing with my sister the arrangements for her wedding next year... So I've been looking at cakes. And in the process I came across:

Cake Wrecks
when professional cakes go horribly, hilariously wrong

Pumpkin Parade

It's hard to choose because most of them are just wrecktastic, and the commentary often has me laughing out loud, but some of my favourite posts on the site are:

• Missed the Mark- don't worry D, we won't order your wedding cake from this bakery!
• Inspiration vs. Perspiration - or this one
• Dial a Wreck - we definitely won't describe what we would like over the 'phone
• What we have here is a failure to communicate - to avoid this
• Cake Writing 201: Congratulations - and we'll send a dictionary along if necessary

Jen, the blogger at Cake Wrecks, does attempt to balance the picture in her Sunday Sweets posts, which really do present some fantastic examples of what cake artistry can look like...

The other site is this one:

Why would you knit that?

This ain't Grandma's afghan

Dissected Rat

Okay, so what do you think? I have to admit to thinking exactly "why. on. earth. would you knit THAT?!" And for those of you who prefer amphibians to rodents, there's a dissected frog too...

Bizarrely (well it seems bizarre to me) it also has a post that's a tribute to Cake Wrecks and features... Oh yes, you guessed it... knitted wedding cakes. I'm sorry, but have I just completely missing the main point of wedding cake?! This being that one should be able to eat it?

Some of my other favourites are:

• It's Yoda! - I love Yoda! Yoda doesn't look too convinced though
• Wearable Lapghan - I had an afghan like this when I was a child (it was purple and lilac and I loved it) but I never thought of doing this with it
• Is this what Dolly Parton was talking about? - I'm all in favour of both colour and texture... Love it actually. But does this work? Really?

Now, I would like to mention (for the sake of full disclosure) that I neither bake nor knit to speak of so it's probably not fair for me to relish these (and giggle) quite as much as I do. I have no doubt when I look at that rat and those knitted cakes that there's way more skill involved than I could ever muster. And I can appreciate that.

And even the worst of the cakes is probably better than I could ever produce. Although I probably wouldn't be trying to sell them. I'm also sure some of them taste quite good despite what they look like.

But still. They are funny. Or am I just warped?