On a journey towards the horizon...

...across unknown terrain, one needs a compass.

in.teg.ri.ty – noun

1. the state or quality of being entire or complete; wholeness; undiminished
2. moral soundness; honesty; freedom from corrupting influence or motive
3. unimpaired, unadulterated, or genuine state; purity

Every year I like to select one concept, one value - one that perhaps has not been getting the attention it deserves - and use it to focus my direction throughout the year. Last year I chose balance. This year it's integrity.

Integrity. Small word, hugely meaningful to me. It encapsulates everything about honesty, honour and sincerity that is important to me. It is one of the qualities I most admire in others and how I seek to integrate and embody all other values I hold dear. I've thought long and hard about how I feel it manifests in someone, in me, and I think what it boils down to is that everything I believe and say and do should be consistent. 

Of course, we are guided by our values and principles every day and it's not that integrity has only just come to my attention, or that I believe I have none. In fact, I hope I have plenty. I am honest - to the point of tactlessness sometimes. I am always questioning what I think and do and seeking better ways of living - to the point of over-analysis sometimes. But if integrity really is important to me, it's about measuring everything I think, say and do against what I believe (and constantly re-evaluating the beliefs to see that they still hold true for me) to see if they are consistent. Only then can I claim integrity as my own.

Because if, for example, I believe that creativity is integral to who I am and how I express who I am, and I then don't make time for creative pursuits in my daily life, I am compromising my integrity. When I work too many hours a week but claim - and believe - that balance is important to me, I compromise my integrity. When I know that the people who love me are as essential to me as air but I don't honour the relationships, retreat behind walls of silence instead of accepting support when I could do with it, or fail to express this love by not getting birthday cards in the mail on time, I compromise on my integrity. When I believe that colour is vital to my soul but buy only black shoes, I compromise my integrity. Small deeds or lack of action that chip away at the integrity I believe to be central to living a fulfilled life.

Most of the time, if I compromise, it's myself I short-change and that's one of the key things I'd like to work on this year. I still struggle with doing anything that might be perceived as selfish and that means I sometimes don't look after myself very well, readily putting the needs or demands of others before my own, despite the fact that I don't believe that this always serves us well. I'll put a lot of energy into convincing others to support their own self-care, and to supporting them in it, but I compromise when it comes to doing this for myself. And when I don't care for my self, those I care for sometimes suffer too. And so I compromise my integrity. 

So this year, the compass for navigating my path is to check - more consciously than ever - all I do, all I say, all I think, against the set of values that are my foundation, including love, compassion, honour, and honesty, and to try and hold a true course towards them, whilst being more gentle with myself. I have no doubt that I will fail at times but my intention is uncompromising, my heart courageous, and my will resolute.

I'd be honoured if you shared my journey. But I can't promise it will always be a smooth ride.

This above all: to thine own self be true,

And it must follow, as the night the day,

Thou canst not then be false to any man.

William Shakespeare

(1564 - 1616)

Edit - provided by a kindred spirit... a perfect quotation that I had not come across before - thank you BruceG

It's not what we eat but what we digest that makes us strong; not what we gain but what we save that makes us rich; not what we read but what we remember that makes us learned; and not what we profess but what we practice that gives us integrity.

Francis Bacon, Sr. 

(1561-1626)